I felt shriveled after an escape into commercial dance, including a year of television. I felt the inner need to do what I really loved serious dance, meaningful dance, to go back to solo dance. But the ideas didn't come. This was a time of doubting. Where do I go from here? Have I anything more to say? Am I finished? A low point! I was tired of looking for answers all alone. I craved asking questions. I ached for someone to tell me what to do. The name Doris Humphrey came to my mind. Not belonging had always been a problem. There had never been anyone in the concert field I could relate to on a personal level. But on March 18, 1945, I had participated in a concert at the 92nd Street YM-YWHA and had invited Doris, who had recently become the director of the dance education department.